Get up CLOSE and PERSONAL

Hey beautiful world!

It’s been quite some time since I last posted due to exams that have been overwhelming me (it that even a legitimate excuse?).

Therefore, desperate to keep up with the postings, I have stumbled upon an application called: Dayre

Do you use Dayre?

I guess it’s not very popular now, but many people across the globe actually use it! I find it to be a very useful and fun app, has an easy-to-use interface, and it actually documents and archives your posts on a day-by-day basis. You can add stickers, pictures (did I mention you can edit the pictures before posting? Easy!), places (where your precious feet has landed on), just regular writing posts, and these are all very simple to upload!

In short, it is a mini blog, for those of you who wish to have sort of a day-by-day basis kind of diary blog (not necessarily diary, but it automatically archives your posts daily). It is somewhat like a social app too, so you can explore other dayre accounts and follow them!

It’s really cool all in all. And I’m totally hooked on to it right now because it is so easy and fast to use.

Do check out Dayre in the Play Market for android users (I’m using android phone!) or itunes/App Market for iPhone users for more details!

My dayre: dayre.me/xelkera

Have fun in the world my lovelies and if you’d be so nice, do pray for my exam which will commence in about….. an hour!

Wishes and kisses,
Kate

A daily dose of xclishmaclaver keeps the smile on all day

S.O.S: Am I being spoiled too much?

Okay. I have a boyfriend, Dan. He is my second boyfriend because the first relationship didn’t work out. Dan is probably the best boyfriend ever. He is so sweet to me and so caring and so thoughtful and loving and patient and blah blah blah. He is so perfect in my eyes. I’m dead serious. He is that good.

And that probably explains why I am so spoiled now.

We’ve been dating for almost 7mths now and I kind of… start to expect more from him. I don’t want to pressure Dan or make him unhappy… Honestly, I never control my boyfriend. I emphasise a lot on freedom and independence that I made a note to allow my boyfriend to take charge of his own life. The problem is… I get frustrated when he acts as if I am transparent when we are with other friends.

I don’t know if he feels awkward being himself with me in the presence of other people, but I feel uncomfortable. He seems so foreign whenever he does that. When I asked him about it, he would just say that he doesn’t want to be so close with me when others are around. But, does that include him ignoring or zoning me out most of the time? I don’t expect him to pay special attention to me all the time but I just hope he will not ‘ignore’ me whenever i ask him something.

I’m perplexed, confused and definitely weirded out. I also feel confused and a little alone whenever this happens. Am I being too clingy or spoiled?

P.S.: Please drop a comment and advise. I will treasure each and every comment generated. Thanks.

A daily dose of xclishmaclaver keeps the smile on all day

Quote

The greatest un…

The greatest unintentional intention is disparity

The greatest: The biggest

Unintentional: Not intended, harmless

Intention:  Intended, with a motive/goal to achieve

Is disparity: Gap

Putting it all together, my quote means: The biggest, harmless goal/motive is creating a gap

What gap? All of you may be wondering. 

Creating gaps (in terms of social, economical and political factors) are unintentional and human nature are inclined to them. To get to the top, you put in a considerable amount of effort in it. You reap what you sow. That is where intention comes in. Goals are to be met, your sights are set. It is undoubtedly an intention. However, It all makes sense. It is right to want to make a change to life. It is logically accounted for that this is how it all works. Therefore it is an unintentional intention. There will definitely be a disparity. The only question is: to what extent?

The world is so vast that no one has ever set foot on every single part of the world. There are so many people, so much knowledge and technology, that a disparity sets the benchmark/system to explicitly display the differences between contrasting issues. The only way to truly overcome it is to never ever lose the real you in the process of climbing the success ladder. Be a virtuous person who is humble yet firm, so that whatever is done that is done in goodness, certainly his/her life will be a life that is beautiful. 

New blog! Fresh from Yours Truly, Kate

Always being ticked off for eating recklessly without much consideration (which I have paid a huge price for… FYI: my inside and outside are pretty much screwed), and with much deliberation, I have chosen to create a new blog (sort of like a ‘sister’ blog). The blog is titled at ‘The Health Diary of Kate’ and will document how I go about working to ‘transform’ myself into a better person both on the inside and outside.

It has not been an easy decision. I knew that in some way or another, by going up a notch in my diet, I will be up against lots of temptations from all directions (Singapore has many, many, many delicacies… and I’m not even kidding!). However, overall I feel that it will be a really good challenge. I get to slim down, have healthier skin and body, feel fresh and good about myself, and even benefits such as cultivating discipline and perseverance.

The road is long and definitely it will be tumultuous, but no matter what, I am willing to take up this challenge. Not only for myself, but also to share with everyone else my experiences and hopefully (fingers crossed!), I am not the only one on this journey.

So come now and join me in building a healthy community at: http://thehealthydiaryblog.wordpress.com/

Till then!

 

P.S.: I’m not moving on to an entirely new blog! xClishmaclaver is my baby and I’m never giving it up! It’s just that now I have two blogs to handle and I’m pretty much excited about it. So stay tuned babes ;)

The story of a love blessed by God

Today I want to share a very special story with all of you. It is about how I got out of being in a ‘dream’ and started living a life.

Many of you may be wondering why in the world am I not living a dream but a life? There is only one reason: because a life is a million times better than a dream, no matter how beautiful and perfect that dream is. Oh, the irony.

I did not understand this simple logic, until recently just last year in October 2013.

Around in January 2013, I met my to-be first boyfriend through online gaming. We got along very well with one another in the game, and we decided to meet in person. As a cautious person myself, I requested for us to meet in a public place where many people were around. I had to say… I was surprised. He looked charming, he is of the perfect build, tall, had a beautiful smile; and instantly, he took my heart. We chatted over a cup of coffee at Starbucks and the moment was amazing. We talked about our interests; and getting deeper into the conversation, I was mesmerized over his air of charm. The deciding factor that made me fall so deep into my first love was that he is also a Christian, the same religion as I am. He was perfect in my eyes. Flawless. He is well-to-do, friendly, and even though he is a man of few words, he was kind and so nice.

That was when everything was perfect.

However, believe it or not, I felt a little held back to move this relationship further. I had a feeling God was telling me that he wasn’t the right one for me. Being the lovestruck and hopeless woman I already am, I pressed on to make this relationship work. I wanted it. It was a dream come true.

On 18 May 2013, we eventually got together. It was such a bliss. We had our first kiss on that very day. Love was definitely in the air. The sparks were flying and sweetness overflowed. My family welcomes and loves him. We were in love. The love was strong for the first few weeks, until we began to have several conflicts along the way. We were probably immature then and because it was our first relationship, we had little knowledge on handling such problems. We quarreled often, and the love vanished. I admit it was partly because of my family background. I was born to a family that has many dark secrets of its own, and it ate away most of my life. I chose family over him. I became stressed, depressed and very lost because I was on the brink of breakdown. It was a very tough period of time in my life.

However, it was also the period of time when I realized that when I needed him most, he wasn’t with me. Even though I pushed him away and kept my family matters mum from him, deep inside I wished he bothered to ask about how I was doing. I was very selfish by lying to him multiple times, and was insensitive to his feelings, but I had hoped he cared a little and asked me why I was acting so strange. I had hoped that he would figure it out. I had hoped, that maybe we would still have a chance. If only he was able to just wait… if only he was able to trust me and wait for me to give this whole family shit a closure. All I ever wanted, was for us to understand and trust each other more. But it was all lost. I knew then that he wasn’t the right one for me.

I broke up with him later around late August, and it was the most heartbreaking thing that ever happened to me. He was my first love, my first kiss, the first one I ever shared a dream with. I cried. So much that my eyes were red and swollen. So much that I unknowingly fell asleep after hours of crying. It may seem exaggerating to be overreacting like this, but to me, it was a sharp stab to my heart. He was my everything. My perfect love. The man who fulfilled all of what I want in a boyfriend. This was just not meant to be. What I needed, was a life.

After a few weeks, I started to think back to my past relationship. Feeling lonely and lost, I said a prayer: Dear Lord, I am sorry for not abiding by your word. I now know and understand that it is not in your will for us to have a lasting relationship. Then, Lord, if he is not the one for me, please, if it is in your will, choose the man you approve of. Amen.

It was a short prayer.

Never did I expect that this prayer will be answered by God. A few days later, I met a man whom I least expected would be my future boyfriend. He was annoying, always teasing people, fairly but acceptably disgusting and had a very low Emotional Intelligence (EQ); though amazingly he has a knack for looking into the depth of the human mind and perceiving how other people think and feel. He was able to put himself into other people’s shoes. Pretty amazing huh?

Not sidetracking, we started to know each other more because we attended the same class for a module in school. We clicked well and honestly, he did charm me a little. But I wasn’t ready for a new relationship. Not until I settled my family problems and got over my ex. He confessed to me in the cutest way ever and I was a little affected by it. I was afraid to move on. I wanted to stay in my little box forever. I told him, and surprisingly he said that he will wait for me no matter how long it takes. A battle took place in my heart. I simply wasn’t ready. I needed time, and he gave me time. It felt heartwarming. He wasn’t my ideal man, because he had some flaws here and there; but for some reason, I felt secure and relieved.

After a month of more ‘getting to know you’ small talks, little prayers with God, and thinking through over and over, I decided to take a step out and accept him. I let him into my ‘little box (my world)’ little by little and he began to court me every single day. On 11 November 2013, I told him I liked him too, and he gave me the sweetest smile ever. Two days later, we shared our first kiss, and that marked the day we got together.

It has been six months since that day.

He was annoying as always, but he is also the sweetest and kindest and most mature man I have ever met. He is understanding and we shared a very strong bond of trust. We each had our own circle of friends, and respected each other’s privacy. Sometimes I would get troubled by his habit of always deciding things on his own and would be upset about it, but he would always pester me about it and made me tell him what I was unhappy about. Then, he would apologize and try to make me all happy, though he ended up doing stupid yet cute stuff that got me cracking up. He would also be upset because I was immature and inconsiderate to certain events. But by taking a leaf from him, I learnt to be patient and understanding. Though I knew a relationship should be honest and true, he made me realize the importance of these two qualities in a relationship and even enhanced it by enforcing them into our relationship.

About two months into the relationship, I was curious about his life before he met me. So I asked him: What was it like before I came into your life? He replied: Life had no meaning. I lost my direction. I had no motivation. In the end, I prayed to God for something or someone to change my life. A few days later, I met you.

I was definitely 100% not expecting that. Linking the pieces together… it felt as if God had planned everything. God showed me the way to my current boyfriend through my prayer, and He showed him the way to me through his. It was indescribable yet it was a miracle. It was as if God blessed our relationship because He was the one leading us along the way. He helped us and loved us. Because God loved us first, we love. Also deciphering it, my current boyfriend was also surprised at the turn of events. We agreed that we have to cherish and treasure each other, because we had a special bond, and God was in the middle our relationship, always guiding us.

I had to say… it was really magical. These six months was incredible, we had mutual respect and trust for each other, we loved each other; and understood one another, even without any of us hinting or prompting anything of the sort. Till the end of time, I am sure we will still love each other as much as we do now.

And this is the story of my love that I felt was a love blessed by God.

What do you guys think about my special encounter? Feel free to comment and share :)

 

P.S.: If you guys haven’t seen my quote about my experience with my ex and my current boyfriend, feel free to read it at http://xclishmaclaver.wordpress.com/2014/05/14/never-look-for/ ! Till then!

Why merely studying doesn’t work

Has any of you ever felt like studying had no meaning? Or ever wondered why dropouts like Walt Disney and Bill Gates are able to become such influential and prominent figures in the entire world? What exactly is education then?

Here’s a breakdown of 3 possible reasons/factors why people study:

1) It’s compulsory (especially if you are living in Developed Countries (DCs) where education is enforced)

2) For broad reasons because good education = good careers = good life

3) Interest in studying

To further understand these points, we should delve in deeper into the three factors that draws people into studying.

1st factor: It’s compulsory

Let’s face it. Education is necessary. We are in the 21st century where technology and knowledge dominates. Without the knowledge, technology may be difficult to be developed. Likewise, without technology, new-found knowledge may take a longer period of time to be discovered. As much as we do not like to study, it is needed to keep the world ‘growing’. With education, we are equipped with skills and knowledge; and these can be translated effectively into use.

2nd factor: For broad reasons

It may seem biased or stereotypical to categorize education as a ‘tool’ to secure a good future ahead, but it is no doubt that grades are indeed a crucial factor in determining education standards; at least, that’s mostly how companies decide who to employ, based on the level of education a person receives. It is naturally acceptable to favour a person who has obtained a ph.D in his/her major over a person who has only completed high school. That is because it is ‘understood’ and taken for granted that the former would have better knowledge and skill in his/her domain of work scope. As the old saying goes: there is no free lunch in this world. High-paying jobs do come with huge responsibilities. Precisely because certain jobs require a higher level of knowledge and skill to perform the required tasks, people are being paid more for their expertise. It is a fair system. You are being paid for your skill, your knowledge, your service, every single thing that you put in to complete the job. This is how employers weigh their options. They take in people who are capable and reliable. However, is true that people who received high levels of education are more capable than those who did not? To a certain extent, yes; but there are always exceptions.

3. Interest in studying

In all due honesty, I have never ever, ever, ever —                                                                 All right, studying can be fun. But the ratio of students who enjoy studying to students who do not are probably 1:8 (May be inaccurate as estimations are based on my experiences and observations). The main point is: Why do some people enjoy studying?

This brings to my focus of today’s topic: Why merely studying doesn’t work? 

To begin, my first question to you, my dear reader, is this: Is there a true co-relation between studying well and life?

Many people may begin debating whether or not education is essential. My answer is, yes, it is essential. But, it should not be made the dominant factor in determining a person’s qualification. What do I mean by that? Simply put, it should not rule your life.

Let us do a simple case study and take a look at Singapore. Singapore invests massively in education and healthcare. It’s education system has produced many students who graduated with exemplary results and is ranked as one of the best countries who has the most efficient education system. It’s medicine course in National University of Singapore is ranked as one of the best schools in the world. In fact, many people came to Singapore to study or receive treatment; because the education and healthcare system is really good. In a nutshell, Singapore provides a ‘world-leading’ education system.

However, what many people do not realize is that there is a huge loophole in the education system. It depends heavily on qualifications. You can easily find a pool of university graduates in Singapore. This is how much Singapore values education. In today’s Singapore, even with a university certificate, it can be difficult to find well-paying jobs; because there are many others with either the same level of qualification, or even higher level of qualification. Resumes flood into companies every half a year when fresh-faced students graduate from university. They are everywhere.

Not only Singapore, but many other DCs are facing the same problem. One way to tackle against the problem is probably to create more job opportunities, which has already been enforced.

However, with the horde of highly qualified future pillars of the economy rapidly increasing, there must be some other way to determine the true capability of a person.

Studying is just a platform to gain more knowledge and skills in a particular major. Without real-life experiences to put them into use, studying doesn’t work at all. In schools, students are ‘caged’ and very well-protected from the ugly face of the working society. As students integrate into the working society, they may easily find themselves drowning in despair as they were not used to the ‘environment’ yet. In schools, students were not taught on how to interact efficiently and effectively with different kinds of people, the schooling environment are less harsh and demanding than in the working environment, and most importantly, studying has an end point. Studying will finish one day. You complete the course, that’s it. That is how simple studying is. But working doesn’t. Work carries on. Every day people go to work. It is a very rigid and routine layout.

As empowered learners and intelligent beings, more and more people are coming to a consensus that ‘well-rounded learners’ may actually gain more in life than people who just ‘study’. A certificate is deemed useless if one does not possess skills that can add value to lives. Integrity, responsibility, humility, perseverance, morality, and a touch of kindness are the key factors that may very well determine your life. While it is true that it is sufficient to earn a stable career with a stable income, it is definitely not enough to make one’s life fruitful. Inner virtues are the ones that are hardest to master and are definitely impossible to study. They can only be learnt through experiences and cultivation. It is very much like a trial and error kind of thing where you make mistakes and learn from it. Powerful people like Walt Disney and Bill Gates grasped these, and therefore are able to rise up to become the world’s most inspiring figures. Of course, an eye for opportunities are vital as well, because time waits for no man. 

What are your views on this article? Feel free to comment and share.

 

DISCLAIMER: Statistics may vary from actual source as they were estimated subjectively. Information in this article are opinionated and based on experiences and observations. In no way is this article particularly intended to promote or oppose to any form of ideology/culture/beliefs. Just so you know, this article is nothing but a daily dose of Kate’s clishmaclaver.